Just Dive In

When did you last wish that you were able to do something - but then did nothing about it? What prevented you? Fear? Lack of confidence? Lack of courage?

Faced with such a situation, how would you have completed the following statements?

'I want to...  but...'

'I wish I could...'

'If only...'

'I would if...'

'But what if...'

What if you always replaced the above with 'I want to and I'm going to...'? Even better, ask yourself 'Why not?' You'd do a lot less wistful thinking about things that aren't really that important and a lot more doing - of the things that matter - that you really want to do.

As a five-year-old, a swimming instructor forced me to jump into the swimming pool - well, that's how it appeared to me at the time. I was terrified and hated the man for it. However, I lived to tell the tale - one which I haven't forgotten in over forty years. Now, I swim most weeks, diving into the deep end and scooting around at the bottom of the pool, in water twice as deep as my height. I'm not a great swimmer but I wanted to improve and I wanted to enjoy the experience: having determined to do something about it, I now relish it.

Last week, my daughter's 10-year-old friend came swimming with us and her confidence in the water astonished me: although she cannot yet swim to the bottom of 11 feet of water, it didn't stop her trying - and if she thought of a new challenge to accomplish, she just tried it. She had the 'I want to and I'm going to' mentality that many adults are bereft of.

I have a list as long as my arm of things that I want to do before I die. Some of them are so important to me that I've attached 'I'm going to' after the 'want'. Others are still dreams which I have not acted upon. Still others, like this blog, are things that I've actually started doing. Having achieved that 'want', I now want to write a book - but I need to start saying, 'I'm going to'.

It's immensely satisfying to be doing something you wanted to do but were initially hesitant to begin. It's also surprising how unwarranted our fears turn out to be when we actually begin something. What a poor image we must have of ourselves if we doubt our ability to do something that is completely within our reach.

What have I done to become more of a 'going to' person?

Firstly, I'm much better at telling others what I want to do - this establishes a sense of accountability and, therefore, a need to say 'I'm going to' so that I can later report to those I've told: 'I've done it'.

Secondly, I'm also better at researching what it is I think I want to do: this either confirms that what I want to do is as important as I think it is - or persuades me that it's not practical and, therefore, no longer important. For example, I once wanted to work in TV production but a taster of it bored me to tears and that desire has fallen off my wish list.

Which brings me to the my third course of action: just try it. You have nothing to lose and, as I hinted at earlier, you may surprise yourself by your natural ability. Thomas Edison, the entrepreneurial inventor, famously said, 'If we all did the things we are capable of, we would astound ourselves.'

I do my best to encourage my two children to do something about their 'want tos': my daughter wants to play the harp: why not? My son wanted to play the trombone: he's just started having lessons at his school. They have bigger ideas as well and who am I to stand in the way of their dreams - apart from advising them to take the similar practical steps I described above?

What's on your 'want to...going to' list? What other things have you wistfully wished for but prevented yourself from attempting because of a 'But what if...' or other such discouraging question?

Be courageous. Be adventurous. Take risks.

Just dive in - what's stopping you?

Thanks for dropping by. Feel free to leave feedback or a comment.

Phil